LIVE BLOGGING CANADA DAY!!!
12:01 pm on the East Coast. Operation Shutdown is going to do a little experiment here. We're going to try and live blog the frenzied first day of NHL Free Agency signing period. We expect to do periodic brief updates. I'm on board, Intern Mike is skipping is Oceanography class at Community College and we've got our buddy Vikram here, who has no knowledge of hockey past NHL '94, but really wants to be part of the show. So without further ado.. onto the live blog...
The first big news is that the Sedin twins, Henrik and Daniel, have resigned in Vancouver for 5 years and $30.5 million each. Toronto fans are certainly depressed with this news, but they can relish the fact that they still have Jeff Finger under contract for a few more years at something like $3 million per year.
There's a rumored Dany Heatley to Edmonton for Dustin Penner (remember him, he's the guy Kevin Lowe gave a ridiculous contract to), Andrew Coligano, and L.Smid. Rumors are that Heatley has denied the trade, because he doesn't want to live in Edmonton. Vikram says maybe there aren't enough people to vehicular manslaughter there. Way to go Vikram! Intern Mike is curious to see what Hossa does. Intern Mike is not a fan of Hossa.
12:13 pm. Whereabouts of Mr. Riley are unknown at this point but he may join in the festivities. Point of parliamentary procedure. During this time last year, Mr. Riley, our buddy Nathan and myself were at the Squirrel Hill JCC taking our BAR/BRI review course for the Pennsylvania Bar. We were getting updates on HFBOARDS.com via my Palm Treo and it was both frustrating and exhilarating at the same time. We were having lunch at a wonderful Jewish Deli eating Matzah Ball Soup when we found out about Hossa. (Intern Mike is hurling obscenities in the background.)
12:17. Matthias Ohlund leaves Vancouver to sign with Tampa Bay. Anyone who played NHL 09 is well aware of Tampa Bay's complete need for defense as their second pairing involves Marek Malik and Jozef Melichar. Yeah. Seriously. Read that again. Marel Malik and Jozef Melicahr. Vikram strongly believes that Tampa Bay should reunite Bob Beers and Joe Reekie to play behind the force that is Bob Bradley. Calm down Vikram.
12:45. Things are moving slow. Rumor mill has the Blackhawks making a strong push for Hossa. "Good, I hope he goes there, fuck Chicago, those fucking crooked democrats like Daley and Blagjoyovich (sp?) run that place." Whoaaaaa.... slow down Intern Mike. There's no place for politics in sports blogging. Although I will admit, I am suprised by Intern Mike's knowledge of the Chicago Political Machine. Rumors the Wild are intersted in Scuderi. We'll miss Scuderi a lot, but he deserves to make some money after playing here for about $700,000 last year. Vikram says he's hungry.
12:50. Florida Panthers re-sign Radek Dvorak, the most underappreciated player in the NHL. He had the opportunity to be a true NHL Super Star but he took the road less traveled and committed to being a team player and doing all the small things well. I love this re-singing. The Habs have re-signed Alex Kovalev to a 2 year $8.8 million dollar contract so at least newly acquired Scott Gomez has someone to pass to. Vikram suggests Indian food for lunch. Way to be a stereotype Vikram.
1:15. Uh oh. HFBoards.com just removed the Alex Kovalev signing with the Habs thread from the "sticky" category. They still need to confirm. Where is TMZ.com when you need them. I'm tasking Intern Mike with contacting TMZ.com to see if they've been able to confirm the Alex Kovalev signing. Toronto just signed Colton Orr. You know, when you miss out on the Sendin twins, Colton Orr isn't a bad Plan B, as long as you don't have a priority with scoring goals. At least Jeff Finger will have someone to hang out with. We're still awaiting word on Dany Heatley. Vikram informs me that no one should "murder their team" in order to acquire Dany Heatley. Vikram is heating up.
2:12. We just returned from lunch. Vikram wanted Indian. Intern Mike wanted barbeque. I wanted Chipotle. We settled for Subway. Hard to turn down the five dollar footlong. Five. Dollar. Footlong. Five dollar footlong. Intern Mike ordered "double meat", which will never not be funny. You know what else will never not be funny? Marian Hossa failing. Hossa just singed with the Chicago Blackhawks to effectively kill the Stanley Cup dreams of their talented youngsters. Intern Mike enjoyed what the rumored deal was for, $60 million over 6 years for a $10 million dollar cap hit. Vikram informed Intern Mike quickly that those numbers simply "don't add up." Turns out it the Blackhawks gave Hossa a 12 year deal for $5.2 million. This is the year after giving ridiculous contracts for Brian "I'm not always out of position" Campbell and Cristobal "five hole" Huet. The Blackhawks have a stable of young talent so it's puzzling they gave Hossa such a large contract. Unless they find someone to take on Campbell's or Huet's ridiculous contracts, cough, Bob Gainey, cough, the Blackhawks could find themselves losing their phenomenal young talent in favor of a thirty something year old failure. While Hossa lost some of the money he would have had last year, he's got his long term security. Vikram thinks it's a solid "nest egg".
2:34. Mediocre Goalie Run! Mediocre Goalie Run! Mediocre Goalie Run! Ty Conklin signs with the Blues, Rolie the Goalie signs with the Islanders to start when DiPietro inevitably gets hurt, Craig Anderson signs with the Avalanche. Vikram asks where Tim Chevelde is currently playing. Intern Mike tells Vikram Tim Chevelde hasn't played in the NHL in at least 12 years. Vikram looks disappointed. Ty Conklin signing with the Blues means he won't be starting in the NHL Outdoor Classic this year. Ty, the NHL Outdoor Classic won't be the same without you, you will be missed. Steve Montador signed with Buffalo. The Blackhawks raid the Red Wings once again for Tomas Kopecky. I hate the Red Wings a lot less now that they're losers.
3:35. Matt Walker, Andy Greene, Joel Ward, Aaron Rome all sign somewhere.. I honestly think these names came out of the "Random Name Generator" when you want to name your rosters in NCAA Football on the PS3 but are too lazy to download the real rosters. Wow, that was winded. The Rangers signed Donald Brashear, who I was genuinely surprised. Intern Mike yells that "That guy straight lays motherfuckers out". Intern Mike might not have straight A's at Community College, but he does have straight A's in "afternoon boozin'". Now this is a team I still don't like. The Capitals. Their coach looks like he should be a clown at a carnival named "Bubbles" and have a really high pitched voice. They do k-nuble the rest of the league by signing Mike Knuble to a 2 year, $2.8 million per year deal. He's exactly what the Capitals need. Fuck. Intern Mike is still on hold with TMZ.com. Still no word on Alex Kovalev.
4:07. Vikram and I just busted out the old SNES and played a real spirited game of NHL 94. I was the Capitals and he was the Winnipeg Jets. 3-1 Capitals. Don Beaupre could not be solved and the Dmitri Kristich from Michael Pivonka connection would not be denied. Bob Essensa needs to bring his A game when he's facing Mr. Ruben. Vikram looks like he's about to cry. Intern Mike is still on hold with TMZ.com, apparently their entire work force is on the Michael Jackson story. The Oilers rebound from losing Rolie the Goalie with signing the always crazy Nikolai Khabibulin. Good for the Oil, bad for the Blackhawks. Have fun going to war with Cristobal Huet Marian. Trust the French.
4:45. Addition by subtraction baby! Hal Gill signs with the Habs. None of us are sad to see Hal Gill leave. At this point of his career Hal Gill does two things exceptionally well: turn the puck over and ice the puck. Now he will be doing those two things exceptionally well in Montreal. We appreciate all you gave us Hal Gill, and we wish you luck in your future endeavours. Erik Cole resigns with Carolina so he can avail himself of more bitching at the hands of Brooks Orpik. Florida Panthers replace Craig Anderson with Scott Clemmensen who played very well when Marty Broduer was injured last year. Vikram is wondering why it's taking so long for Heatley to receive his death sentence in Edmonton. Vikram, when you're on, you're on.
5:31. Bob Gainey makes a smart move and the Habs sign Mike Cammalleri. Cammalleri was a top 10 goal scorer in the league last year. While Cammalleri might be a tad bit undersized and generously listed at 5'9, he provides a whole lot of speed and a whole lot of offense for a Habs team that looked pretty fucking awful last year. I like this move. But then again I may be biased because Cammalleri is currently the marquee Jewish player in the league. Intern Mike, who is still on hold with TMZ.com yawns. Vikram is playing the computer in NHL '94 and is getting work done with Petr Klima, who coincidentally, Vikram is angry is not still in the NHL. Guy Hebert is getting abused. Poor Mighty Ducks.
6:05. Toronto gets more guys to hang out with Jeff Finger as they agree to terms with the biggest prize defenceman left on the free agent market in the bruising Mike Komisarek. Komisarek "lights motherfuckers up" says Intern Mike, who is now about two six packs deep. I'm starting to think he isn't even on hold anymore with TMZ and he is just drunk and holding the phone to his ear. If Brian Burke wants a physical team, well that's clearly what he's going for. Maybe he's just gonna say fuck it and play five guys back on defense and just beat the shit out of other teams. I wouldn't put it past him. Vikram is dying waiting for word on Heatley. "He might as well just kill me with a car already and put me out of my misery", says Vikram. Vikram is getting a little grumpy. If I told you Vernon Fiddler was one of the designers of World of Warcraft, would you believe me? I would. Anyway Phoenix just signed him. I thought since they were bankrupt they'd have to settle for the extras from the movie Miracle to fill out the roster. That was lame. I'm getting tired.
6:21. That was fun. I just spent the last 10 minutes trying to convince Intern Mike that Bernie Nicholls was attempting a comeback with the San Jose Sharks. At first, Intern Mike yelled "you fucking liar, Bernie Nicholls is like 64 years old [he's 48]". Then I pulled up Wikipedia and showed him that both Jeremy Roenick and Claude Lemiuex were on the Sharks. A shocked Intern Mike responded with, "yeah, I can see that." Too much booze Intern Mike, too much booze. Then Vikram shouted from the couch, "Is Bernie Nicholls still on the Devils?". Welcome to 2009 Vikram. Sami Pahlsson signs with Columbus for $2.75 million per year. Nice move. Great checking line player and a great individual. Steve Sullivan re-signs in Nashville. Fuck. I thought he'd be a great steal for the Pens. But don't worry, the Pens signed Mike Rupp and Brian Strait, which quite frankly sound like extras for Big Fat Wet Asses #9.
6:55. Holy shit. Intern Mike finally got through on the phone with TMZ.com. There's breaking news. They're saying that they have a source who will only refer to itself as "Eklund" who says a big deal is on the horizon. TMZ.com is reporting that the Detroit Red Wings are closing in on a multi-year contract with Marian Gaborik. How the hell TMZ.com received this information is beyond me but Intern Mike claims they claim that "Eklund" claims it's reliable. Well how about that. The Fucking Detroit Red Wings are going to land Marian fucking Gaborik. Not fair. I am angry. Intern Mike is angry. Vikram is still annoyed with the Oilers-Senators hold up on the Heatley deal. See, Vikram still loves Petr Klima and thus claims he loves the Edmonton Oilers even though I doubt Vikram even knows where Edmonton is on a map. Intern Mike yells out "Edmonton is in Canada!". I think it's time we put Intern Mike to bed. "Just leave it to Heatley to kill this fucking deal, he's got a lot of experience with killing things." After nearly seven hours, Vikram still has his fastball. Unlike Mariano Rivera.
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